Late 20's... wah wah

26…. About to be 27 and all I can seem to do these days is worry about that fact that I am approaching 30 and nowhere near where I thought I would be at this point in my life. I wanted a partner, stable job, considering homeownership, a dog, and a fabulous apartment that’s maybe been featured in a magazine or two. But then as the barista who served me my coffee said, “Surest way to make God laugh is to tell God your plans.” 

And lets face it what are my plans or anyone else’s plans typically; it’s a list of material or tangible benchmarks were we compare ourselves to the people around us. So and so has the perfect house, perfect partner, perfect pet, perfect life! I want that, I need that to be happy. No I don’t and when I take a moment to think about it I can be happy with the point in life I’m at. I may not be were I thought I would be, but I don’t have it bad by any means. I live in an amazing city that still holds an unknown numbers of adventures for me to have. I am continuously evolving in my relationships with new and old friends. I am apart of an amazing Christian community that supports me in more ways than one and I have decades ahead of me to enjoy life. I just have to remember that I need to appreciate what’s around me now rather then what I want around me in the future. My timeline and God’s timeline can be two completely different things. As JC once taught:

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear?’ For it is the Gentiles who strive for al these things. But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today.                                     

~Matthew 6:25-34

Personally, I believe ‘striving first for the kingdom of God’ entails not a list of things you should and shouldn’t do but rather living life that honestly engages the community around you. How we do that seems to be different for different people, but I believe that being honest is caring for people, not caring what they think. I believe that being honest is allowing yourself to be vulnerable and admitting that you don’t have all the answers right now, but willing to explore, change and grow with the people that are around you. We’re all on this journey called life and support comes from people and places when we allow ourselves to be open to the reality that life is truly a mystery.